Ever get tired of fighting?

By Poptartz on Sun, 02-19-12, 10:19

Posted in Group:

Do you ever wake up in the morning and just feel like your done? You feel like your so tired and hopeless that the only solution is to give up on trying to be a happy person. Thats how i woke up today , wrapped in the arms of the boy I love I woke up feeling like I was nobody. Not like usual where I wake up either feeling like a girl or a boy but I woke up feeling like an empty box. and now i dont know what to do with myself. I have urges to cut but only because im craving the ability to feel some what full. If you get that? Right now i feel empty and dead and ugly and disgusting. Its horrible because i have the best thing i could ask for begging me to come back to bed and cuddle with him and i cant even do that because i feel like a nothing. So my question is, Is it okay to cut if its not really to "hurt" myself? If I can feel for alittle while is it really that bad?

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By Lucinda on Sun, 02-19-12, 18:29

Cutting typically isn't about just hurting yourself. It's handling emotions in an unhealthy way. Feeling like nothing is still feeling and to avoid handling that in a healthy way cutting is easier and in the short term it makes everything better.

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By Poptartz on Mon, 02-20-12, 17:51

Ive realized this but everytime i try to stop all i can think is maybe if i just cut once it will get better?

pop...pop...pop...POPTARTZ!!!

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By qroberts2012 on Sat, 02-25-12, 08:43

Wow. I'm new to this site and as I was scrolling down the site your words just popped out at me. It's bizarre this feeling I have right now. I can totally relate to what you're saying. Somedays I look at myself with such disgust, and other days I feel so blessed that I'm still alive today. My first thought this morning was " Why the heck am I still alive?" But instead of harming myself I just go to a tattoo shop and get inked. I personally think its a lot better than cutting. Lol my left arm is covered in ugly scars while my right arm has beautiful art that I am willing to show off for the rest of my life.

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